1. Locals consistently and humorously say Anderson sucks and you should never have come.

You've made a terrible mistake, go home now!

2. It's not that bad.

Huge beers are only $4 at Kroakerheads

3. Corn is neat.

It's just like the movies, except not as inviting to run through as you might expect

4. The State Park is nice.

See the Mounds! Do some water-sittin'! Video

5. It's rustic. Real America. See?

Well... actually this isn't Anderson. I guess we're done here...